Oh, and btw...

Um, yeah, I had another thought, completely "off topic" for tonight:

I don't need to be "fit in" to some man's life to the place where I just don't have my own at all anymore. F that. Sure, I'll be "right" for him and all, but seriously, the bottom line is this: he HAS to fit into my life to my satisfaction or forget it. And he HAS to have a life of his own too, just as I have a life of my own. We both have to be people who can make it on our own, apart from each other, and who continue to have our own lives even though we would spend some time with each other. Seriously. I want to not have us "wanting" each other, like being all desperate for each other or something. I've somehow moved way out of that zone. Sure, I want us to be comfortable and happy with each other! But you know, I've seriously lost the desire for romance. It's all a bunch of fake hu-hah anyway, designed to supposedly make people want sex. Well, who cares anyway? Sheese. It's just sex. Honestly, I may not have had it, but I've done enough other things in the past to know pretty much what it's about, and I honestly don't need a lot of buttering up, etc. I really don't give a hoot.

See, this is what happens when you finally get a life of your own, unfettered by wacko circumstances. Oh, wait, I forgot my schedule. Oh well. He'll just have to be some guy who doesn't care that I sound and act like an idiot all the time 'cause I don't get enough F'n sleep anymore.